Thursday, August 18, 2011

Technology, ain't it grand?

I'm an early to work person (do not confuse this with a early morning person, two different things!) and one day I was in the kitchen, waiting for my bread to toast. It was early, so no one else was in, and it was very quiet. As I was washing off my spoon, the kitchen was filled with the sound similar to a truck backing up. I yelped slightly and jumped before realizing this was the toaster.

A light had light up on it as well, after about 5 seconds my toast popped out. I was now pretty grumbly that the toaster had scared the beejezus out of me. So I sent off a rant to a couple old co-workers about the toaster who's intent is to give everyone a phobia of toasters. (I imagine my cats would pee their pants and run if they heard this thing, and potentially take it out during the night so it could scare no longer).

My friends had a good laugh on my account and wrote, "I believe this to be a toaster model made for the new generation: shinier, louder and with useless features."

Testing this theory, I went back to exam the toaster as there were a number of buttons in it, however I had not looked at them closely. I came up with:

Snowflake symbol: Misleading symbol, I think a melting snowflake would make more sense, as the toaster heats things up, not freezes them.

Bagel symbol: Would be a nice feature if your bread were to turn into a bagel, in any flavour you should desire.Otherwise useless, I didn't notice and different when I tried bread on that setting.

The Doom symbol: AKA cancel (sadly forgotten to have written it's description).

Last symbol... a piece of bread with a wavy line underneath and a triangle inside. I'm still puzzled by this one, I figure that this one must have been created by someone forming in the construction business, as those signs hardly ever make sense.Couldn't even figure out a word to describe it. Useless symbol? Fill-in-the-Spot symbol?

Theory back on this toaster was now: this maybe an elite toaster military in origin from Bizaro World and to beware! (Well was actually told to RUN!).

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